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Wednesday, 03 March 2010


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Thank *you*, dear Thalia, for being here and writing and commenting. (3.6 posts a week for 5 years seems pretty impressive to me!) And you should know, I have always considered you to be a major "glue-er" in our world--you commented so faithfully on so many blogs, and had such an extensive blogroll yourself, and I found many of my longtime reads through you.

I've been thinking lately that there are 3, maybe 4 waves of IF/loss blogs, sort of like American feminism perhaps. The first wave, the founding mothers--Grrl, Julia, Julia, Julia, Tertia, Karen, Cecily, Danae, etc., who started up in 03, 04. The second wave, those of us directly inspired by the first wave, and I guess I include you and me in there, and Pru and Erin and Ornery and Beth and many other of our cohort, who started up in 05, 06. The third wave, when the community really exploded, in 07, 08 and on. And maybe now we can't even be measured in waves, because there are so many, more and more every day. And a lot of the third and fourth wave take it for granted that there's a community, and don't know what it was like when there were so few, and likely don't even know about some of the founding mothers at all.


Thank YOU! Your blog has made my life better. It really has. I might not comment on every post, but I do read them all. I don't have my own blog, but I've often thought I should. Perhaps 2010 will be the year for me to begin.
Also, I live in Toronto (well the suburbs) and if you are available when you are here, I'd love to meet you for a coffee or tea or something and tell you in person. Please email me if you're interested.


Believe it or not, I started reading your blog almost right from the beginning, when you were 4-5 months in. I read grrl but only at the end of her blog. I kept thinking she would come back... I was disappointed that she never did. I am sure she probably has another blog but I didn't know her writing well enough to identify her and she took down her archives.

I didn't comment right away... I had an unusual internet shyness for the first year. By the time I starting commenting I also started blogging which ironically will be 4 years ago, 3 days from now.

Thank you Thalia, for sharing your story, for coming back here even after you were "discovered" and for being part of the creation of this community.


Happy Blogiversary! I couldn't imagine the IF blog world without you.


Congratulations, Thalia! I know, the blogging world is getting bigger and I still miss many of those who've left - Grrl, Akeeyu, Emily...although there has been good news for them, and others I haven't mentioned.

Don't you wish there was a TARDIS or something so we could all meet for the best group ever?

Hairy Farmer Family

Happy Blogoversary dear!

I fully comprehend your affection for your beginnings. I would chop off significant parts of my anatomy (maybe... half a finger?!) in order to have discovered this community earlier. I was late to the party, and my mental health suffered needlessly because of that.

This is an anniversary that completely requires toasting, you realise?


Happy bloggiversary, dear Thalia! I don't know what I would have done without you during the Dark Ages -- and to have you and me both have our babies at the same time was a gift from heaven. You have always been a fount of information and support, and I'm sure you've helped dozens, if not hundreds of us get the help we needed.

Five hundred posts is amazing. I don't even want to think about how few I've written...

Your observations about the developments in the IF community are so true. I feel fortunate to have been around while the group was still so small -- and am completely overwhelmed by the number of blogs out there now. There are so many good ones, so many that I would love to read, but it's become completely unmanageable. I'm so glad there's Mel and the LFCA so that there's at least a bit of overview. I think and hope you're right, that we just all find our own groups.

As for non-English-speaking blogs, I can speak only for Germany -- and there's really nothing comparable here. Either I'm not searching right, or IF blogs just don't exist. Chatrooms and IF community sites, yes, but no proper blogs. I have often wondered why that is.


Wow, nearly 12,000 comments. That's fantastic. Happy blogiversary.

For me, personally, you were one of the first bloggers I read. And I am truly thrilled that you are still blogging. 3.6 posts per week sounds fine to me, so long as you're still around.



Happy bloggiversary!

I might have said this at your last bloggiversary, but I'm glad I found your blog when I did. You've shared not only your experience, but also a lot of your knowledge.

I briefly looked for more local blogs, but everyone still seems to be stuck in forums and chat rooms. I find those too confusing to follow.

The community is exploding, which is sad as it means there are so many of us. I'm starting to believe that 1 out of 6 couples statistic.


Yes, yes, yes. I had my 5 year blogiversary in Dec. and feel just the same way!


Golly. Have some of us been blogging for that long?


Congratulations and many happy returns, my dear Thalia. And thank you for your blog. It was so WONDERFUL to find British bloggers out there back in the wilderness of 2006.


Five years is a huge accomplishment. I hope you are having a wonderful celebration.


Congrats on 5 years.


5 years and 500 posts is amazing! Congrats! :) What a great thing to have all these memories written down - I would have loved to have the last 5 years of my life cronicled like this and it's one reason why I continue with my blog.

This post was so touching and thoughtful. I find the social networking stuff facinating!

Ellen K.

Congrats on reaching 5 years!


Well done Thalia! I'm glad you continue because I truly enjoy your writing.

I had mixed feelings about walking away after 3+ years, but I lost the compulsion I had felt to blog and didn't want to load forced drivel upon the dears who still came by.


Congratulations! I think 500 posts in 5 years is quite impressive, actually.
Thanks for sharing your experiences here. I have a blog, but don't write about IF as it is read by many family members... I haven't sorted out if I want another blog for this (when I barely manage to keep the other one updated). I agree, though, that it's not quite fair to read here and not share my part of the story. Maybe I'll find a good solution eventually.

Nancy Ketzwick


you are not alone, and you have one more friend,

best wishes,



Congratulations, we'll celebrate with a toast when you come into town. :)


The glue changes, it grows, it adds more glue and it lessens. This IF space, sadly, has more than enough room for many. But I am so, so glad that you are still here and have been, because you are the one person who has stats on everything, all wrapped up with an arm around the shoulder and a nice glass of white.


Happy Anniversary, dear Thalia!

You were my Julie and I have and always will value your advice and comments. I am so grateful that you decided to start blogging 5 years ago and so happy that you are still blogging.


Well hello Thalia....five years eh? (Man, how Canadian did I just sound??? hehe). I completely remember finding your blog, and being so amazed that there were other women 'out there' experiencing, living, surviving and writing about exactly what I was experiencing, living, surviving and trying to write about. My blog was therapy for me for so long. I wandered away for a long time, but always kept my blog bookmarked. Today I dug out my password and posted - first post in close to two years. So much has changed in the blogosphere. I still recognize some names, but there are (sadly) so many many more people struggling with infertility and the lasting impact of it. I'm going to get caught up on your life now! Happy anniversary! I'm honoured to have been one of your first commenters!

Betty M

Belated congratulations on the impressive achievements in longevity, posts and comments. You are still one of the rare if bloggers with a total grip on the science and a valuable link in the network whichever wave you initially belonged to.


Wow - has it been that long? Congrats!

I'm with Electriclady's perception of the waves of blogging. I have tried to read some newer IF blogs and I find myself just reflecting on what used to be.

Those were the days...


Very belated, but still very heartfelt bloggiversary wishes dear friend! You have done so much for this community in the past 5 years -- support, encouragement, education, advocacy. We became a more compassionate and more empowered group of women because of you.

I'll just add that for me it seems hard to believe that it's been *only* five years since you started blogging. So much has (or has not) happened since then, and I'm so happy for you and how things have worked out. Sending you big bloggiversary hugs. xx

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