To the asshole in possession of my shopping

Dear Asshole,

I'm impressed. It took you a maximum of 15 minutes after I left the crowded coffee shop to steal the large Hobbs bag sitting behind the leather armchair, pressed against the glass. I know it wasn't more than that because when I called and finally got through to the incredibly unhelpful coffee shop manager, she swore blind it wasn't there, and that was no more than 20 minutes since I'd left the shop, struggling through the crowds with my whiny baby, the changing bag, and my other shopping bag - luckily the one that contained the two essentials of the day, formula and tampons. It's even possible you managed to swipe the bag before I left since I can't remember seeing it when we packed up to leave the shop.

Since the shop manager was so extraordinarily unhelpful I also managed to get a friend's husband to pop down there just in case, and indeed it was gone. I couldn't go back myself, given as how I was halfway home by then, with a whiny, hungry baby, and sadly no husband at home to dispatch myself as he is off having a manly weekend in the wind and rain somewhere.

I'm not quite sure what you're going to do with the stuff. It represents my entire winter working wardrobe and cost rather a lot of money. My credit card company says it can't repay me since stealing doesn't fall under their protection plan. This seems a bit unfair, but I know better than to argue with people who don't care in a call centre- that way madness lies. I've done my best to get some recompense, and have left a fairly vitriolic message for the unhelpful lady's managing director, but that's apparently it. No new work clothes for me. Good luck with the houndstooth suit, grey trousers, silk shirt and cream cardigan. I'm fairly sure you're not going to wear them and I'm very sure you're not going to get back what I paid for them. So I guess you had a good day. And I, along with the whiny baby with a runny nose, did not.

Yours

Truly pissed off Thalia

Comments

[Betty M]

Bastards. You must be livid. I know too well the hell of shopping with a bored baby in tow. Your home insurance might cover it if the card co is being so unhelpful?

[Jamie]

I had a very similar experience with my purse just a few weeks ago. I can't believe how easy it is for people to steal... It was one of the worst days I've had in a long time so I can feel your pain.

I hope tomorrow is a better day.

[Aurelia]

Oh crap that is really really awful. I'm so sorry. I recently lost a new cardigan after leaving it in a coffee shop and when I ran back to get it it was gone.

One of those rather enraging things, isn't it?

I am sorry. I hope that when the sales start up, you might be able to replace them with other stuff.

[Geohde]

Oh crapola.

May I lend you my curses to the stinking thief?:

May his testicles rot and his willy shrivel up and fall off at a publicly embarrassing moment.

May his underwear be forever hole-y and his socks pair-less.

May his pockets be eternally torn, and his wallet fall down a particularly unclean public loo, right after someone with virulent gastro has done an untidy number two. May there also be no remaining toliet paper.

May his pubes spontaneously combust and giant zits occupy his nose.

May especially malodarous dog crap affix itself intimately to the underside of his trainers.

May week-old chewing gum find it’s way into his hair-do.

May he be infested with particularly ineradicably lush ear-hair, a nasty case of jock itch and several creative verrucas.

May an extensive infestation of intestinal worms make his bottom itch no end.

May an unusually well-aimed albatross with dysentry shit right down the inside of the back of his shirt.

It would serve him right.

(or her, as the case may be...)

xx

J

[Aurelia]

toots there is something wrong with your feed? This feed came up as off, so clicked it, and of course, now that I've told you, likely it will come back perfectly now.

[Sara]

Remind me never to piss off J!

I'm so sorry, Thalia. That sucks. Bastard.

Oh, that totally sucks. What a mean person-and your right they will probably just resell the clothes. Shopping for clothes can be such a choir-to have all that hard work taken from you is just horrid! I hope whatever they took shrinks for them on the first wash! :(

[Girl Detective]

Call the shop where you bought them, if you haven't already. The thief will probably try to return them for credit or a cash refund.

[Tinker]

People can be so selfish and uncaring -- that stinks!

[MsPrufrock]

Ugh. I'm so sorry Thalia. I know the frustration and anger of people taking what isn't theirs. I am pissed off mightily on your behalf. Bastards.

[Kay/H]

I also blame the other people in the shop who had to have noticed someone going over to where you just (or still) were and taking your bag. Assholes, all of them.

BTW I'm assuming that this isn't the type of place where they would have cameras and videotape?

I'm so sorry, sweetie.

[nikole]

This is awful. Awful. I' so sorry.

[Portia P]

What a bummer. It would really, really p**s me off too.

Did you call Hobbs to let them know in case the scumbag goes in for a refund? Perhaps they could do something?

oh shit, that really really stinks. i'm so sorry. and knowing how hard shopping with a baby is, i think i would have gone home and cried.

[Sarah]

that was me above, somehow typepad lost me.

[Summer]

You're way to kind in calling this person an asshole. Way to kind.

[Liz]

That's really horrible!! I don't know if it's the same where you are, but in the US either renter's or homeowner's insureance usually covers that kind of thing if you've got it.

[Katie]

It should be covered under your household insurance - it often covers baggage on holiday, and almost always covers your possessions when they are out of the house (Even if they never went into the house!)

And if you need an insurance document interpreter/moaner, I'm married to a professional one...

(And Girl Detective is pretty canny and lives up to her name - do that too!)

[OvaGirl]

Gah. I'm sorry. And I bet the coffee was shit too. I hope things are sunnier your way now...

[Rosepetal]

Surely you mean arsehole? :-)
and yes indeed s/he was one.

[Kath]

Oh shit, Thalia, how appalling. I'm so sorry. I can just imagine how hard the shopping was to begin with, and then that absolutely nasty shock. You poor thing. I hope you get compensated for (at least some of) your loss, and that you find an chic and affordable replacement for the clothes. Gah, I'm so disgusted with people!

[Flicka]

What a low thing to do! A woman's new clothes are so...I don't know. I mean, new clothes are such a pick-me-up. To steal them is just beyond mean. It's like kicking a puppy. I'm so sorry. People are jerks sometimes.