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Sunday, 27 April 2008


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Rachel Inbar

I hope your wait ends up being surprisingly short.

Enjoy your trip :-)


It's funny how quickly we forget. And then, it's funny how quickly it all comes flooding back. Sigh. Hopefully it'll be easier the second time around.



It's not ridiculous to hope at all, but it makes the loss of the possibility harder to bear than if we hadn't really cared much.
if that makes sense.



It's not ridiculous to feel the way you're feeling. I think you have to forget in order to survive. No one can live with the intensity of IF forever. You've had such a lovely time with Pob and she's obviously restored some of your hope, as did her miraculous conception. Hoping for it to happen again isn't silly, it's normal and human. I'm hoping the same thing for you but if that doesn't happen, I'm praying strength and peace for you as you go down this road again. You're very strong, my dear.


I was just saying to OvaGirl how there are times you feel as if you've "moved on" (casual as that sounds), then all it takes is one cycle to take you right back to the place you thought you'd left behind. The more things change the more they stay the same.

I'm sorry that there is disappointment for you. It's not remotely silly to be optimistic, you silly lady.


I am so sorry, sweetie.


I am right there with you. I will be seeing my doc tomorrow to begin monitoring my ovaries (and attempt to get pregnant naturally . . . of course with a hormone shot if need be). My new doc thinks there shouldn't be any problems with me getting pregnant (we are unexplained infertiles). Deep down, honestly, my gut says I'll have to go through IVF again. It was brutal going through IVF, but when I look at my son's (now 15 mos) face, it was all worth it.

Anywho, I had a BFN last month and I was depressed about it. Why does conceiving a baby have to be such difficult I kept asking myself. And then in walks my boy. I'll be okay if I don't have another, b/c he is my joy. Now, if only I can figure out how to keep him my baby. They grow up so fast!

Best wishes on TTC,


It's not ridiculous, but it is still early...I'm not counting you out yet, and crossing fingers that this time around will be a million times easier for you.


I've wondered what it will be like the second time around. How long we will wait until we try again and will it be easier.

In any event, may your wait be short and enjoy your vacation.


I think you hope to get a chance at feeling like a normal woman for once. It's not ridiculous at all.

Good luck.


It is extraordinary how thin that membrane is between now and that gutwrenching past and how the sight of that tiny white space can bring it all crashing back. I'm sorry Thalia.


I think all the feelings you felt and feel are completely normal. I hope your time to #2 will not be long and fraught with anxiety, but if it is, we are here with you.


Not in the least bit ridiculous either to be hopeful or sad. I think it's great that you're cycling again, and I am *very* hopeful that even though this cycle wasn't it for you, one of the next few will be.


Not ridiculous at all to think that maybe, maybe things could work for you like they work for other people. Of course it's disappointing.

BTW you'll laugh that I paused for a moment after the second sentence and thought "Gee, I think you're supposed to read the OPK after like 5 minutes and not wait 3 days..." And then I read it again. Ahem.

Have a wonderful trip, sweetie. Keep us posted. xx


Thinking of you...

Girl Detective

Not ridiculous at all to hope that things go easier for you this time 'round. Or to feel way more than a bit sad with a negative. You're allowed to want what you want. Just because you've gotten a shorter stick than many doesn't mean you give up hope or want; they belong to you.

Betty M

Not ridiculous at all. Hope the trip goes well.

Lettuce Hater

oh gosh no, not ridiculous at all



Not ridiculous at all... and it brings it all back doesn't it? Pob I'm sure takes the sting away some, but it's still gut wrenching hard to land back in the trenches... sometimes you wish just for a get out of jail free card to pull you out of the trenches. Hang in there... and know we're here for you.


I'm sorry that your sad. It's never ridiculous to hope. Never.

Hope you and Pob have a great trip.


Sorry about your news...it is so tough all this stuff, it is a wonder we stay sane.

Hope you get your turn soon.


All I can say is that I do the same damn thing every month. I'm sorry for both of us...


So sorry about your bad news...big hugs...

Ms. Planner

Sending some comforting thoughts your way.

motel manager

I am about to do an FET, and I was cruising along, assuming it would work (more or less), and then I realized that the embryos might not thaw, might not culture, etc., and now I am back to my infertility angst again.

May your next cycle work - there does seem to be something to the idea that a successful pregnancy gets your hormones back in balance, and it definitely keeps your endo away for a while. Many fertile vibes headed your direction.....!


Not silly at all. I think all IFers go through the pregnancy honeymoon where you begin to think the next time it will just happen like a "normal" person. Then, unfortunately, for too many of us we don't have that lucky fertile window we always hear about in the IF urban legend world.



It's not silly to hope and really, you never know, it just might work again the old fashioned way.

That said, I think you will be very successful this time, because you know what's up. You can go to the clinic you want to go to, get the protocol you want, you don't need to mess around with trying this or that.

Honestly, you are ahead of the game this time, even if you have to do IVF.


It is not ridiculous at all. I am counting the seconds until my appointment with the RE in the fall, and I have frickin' triplets!

another karen

well, if you're ridiculous, then so am i.

my miracle baby is 9 months old; she is the absolute light of our lives (though, god what i'd give for just ONE decent night's sleep); everything about and with her is as wonderful as i always knew it would be. and, yet - - still - - a BFN yesterday left me in a puddle of sadness and frustration (though at least the heart-ripping DESPERATION wasn't mixed in anymore).

and, an hour later, when she came home from a swim with her dad, smiled and reached out for me, i knew we'd all be just fine this time around - no matter what happens.

wishing you all the best,


I can completely relate. It's not insane to feel that twinge of disappointment. Being an infertile can't rob you of hope completely. I'm hoping for success for you soon.

Lut C.

It would be odd if you weren't disappointed.

I'm so not ready to start all that again. I'm sorry you feel the pressure of time so heavily. Hopefully, a sibling will come along soon.


I felt like that the first time I cycled naturally - I actually ovulated! Like a normal woman! For the first time in years! And even though H and I had NOT timed our marital relations well at all, I was crushed when I got my period. I tried not to be, but I was.

I'm sorry your shield has dissolved with disuse. I hope it works out for you this year, and I hope you won't need your shield this time. And that you will have, are having, and/or will have had a lovely vacation by the time you read this comment.


Not at all ridiculous. I'll be there with you soon.

Good luck hon!


I know how you feel...I was just there. Hoping that for some reason I was cured of IF, but just like you after the first month or so, I knew that I had to get back on the horse. Hang in there...you never know...it might just work. Good luck!


Definitely normal feelings. Even with my trio, I stick feel a knot in my stomach when I see pregnant women. I'm so sorry to hear your feeling down.


Wait! Come back! Are you back yet? We need to talk about this. OK, ASSUMING nothing happened this cycle, are you really ready for number two? Are you going to just say screw it (literally, heh) and try every month? Why in the world would you think it is ridiculous to hope and to lose hope? It seems like the most natural reaction.

Oh honey. I hope you are able to enjoy your trip. Check in when you can.


i have been thinking a lot about what starting over means. having found success once sends me back to that wretched hopeful place where it all began, and we all know what follows that. perhaps now with my jaded self-protective armor but also a taste of victory i will be better suited to the battle?


Hi Thalia, just checking in, hope all is good for you and that you had (or are having - in Sydney so mine's done and dusted, confused as to what time it is your way etc) a lovely Mothers Day.


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