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Friday, 09 June 2006


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Oh sweetheart, I am so sorry. Having been through this twice before I know the heartache. There is nothing can really say to make you feel better other than, I am really sorry and if you ever need to chat, scream, etc, I will be there for you. oh god this is so bloody unfair. I would give anything if I could change this for you.


I've been trying to leave a comment but something kept going wrong....

Anyhoo, great post. I SO get it. Everyone and their lives keeps on swirling on around you, but you're kind of stuck in the middle just observing. Sometimes I want to just scream WHAT ABOUT ME??????

Thinking of you both.

Gravida Zero

That was a very beautiful, eloquent post, if heartbreaking. While I don't pretend to have ever felt as much pain as you are feeling, I have often had the same thoughts. I am thinking of you hun.



I want to thank you for this post.

My thoughts are with you xx


I am so very proud of you for being able to be at a celebration while mourning your own very present tragedy. It isn't fair that you had to endure so much joy when all you want to do fold into yourself and weep. Take the time to mourn your loss. I made the mistake of not doing that the first time around, and I now feel like I was disrespectful of the experience.

It sounds trite, but get a massage and drink lots of water. It won't make the sadness go away, but it'll help purge the synthetic hormones and it certainly will help the insane feeling. Those hormones are intense.

I wish I had words of comfort. I wish I could be with you.


I can't think of anything to say that would express how much I wish you weren't going through this. Never having been in your shoes I simply can not imagine how wrenched you are with grief. I will keep you in my prayers.

k #2

Thalia...I am your 57th post. 57 people who care enough to post at your site and remind you that you are not alone, even when your family isn't sure about how to handle their feelings of sadness with you. I can imagine that they are confused about what you might "need" right now too. Hugs....


I'm just so sorry.

Carla Hinkle

Thalia -- I am just so sorry. Having to put on the brave face for family just seem like adding insult to injury.

We are all here for you.


Thalia - I am sorry, I just had to de-lurk and send you some more support. Please know that we understand where you are coming from and thank you for sharing such raw emotion with us, so that we too know that we are not alone.


I would bet that everyone around that table thought that putting on a happy face would be more helpful to you than talking about your tragic situation or offering you words of solace. They were wrong, but that's what I've experienced with my friends and family. You are in your own hell and it doesn't seem right that the sun would continue to shine. I'm so sorry.


Thalia -

I remember the day I learned my aunt had died. It was a beautiful sunny day, and people were everywhere, laughing and living so fully, and I felt as though I were out of sync with the world, that the sky itself wasn't dark and gloomy.

I wish I could give you a hug. I wish your family were sharing your joy instead of awkwardly stuttering around your sadness.




My heart is utterly breaking for you. I'm so sorry. So very sorry.


Thank you. Maybe that's a weird thing to say, but you put into words what my heart has been screaming and hasn't been able to say. When my family hasn't known how to respond, it has been such a comfort to hear from others in similar positions.

I'm just so sorry to hear about your loss. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.


Oh, Thalia. I wish fertile people could put themselves in our shoes, but most of the time they simply cannot. And, a lot of times people don't acknowledge situations for fear of saying the wrong thing. But, there is something to be said for sympathy, too. Sympathy doesn't require a deep level of understanding, just the attempt to understand. Anyhow, I'm so sorry you are going through this. It's obvious by all your comments how loved you are by all of us :)


It is pouring rain in my world for you today. My heart just breaks.

Lola Badeggs

A beautiful poem and an equally beautiful post. I remember so well that feeling of bewilderment that the world didn't stop while my husband and I grieved our lost children, our lost innocence. And I remember, too, the realisation that despite not wanting others to go through what we were going through, I still wanted them to be miserable. It does get better. Never again what it was, but it does get better.

I'm so, so sorry for your loss.


I am sorry Thalia. I am thinking of you!

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