It's a war in there

Thought I'd continue on the Dar theme. Another week without a blog entry, what has got into me? Work, mostly, but also how much time it takes to check up on everyone. Pretty much every time I find a new infertility blog I feel a need to add them to my check in list, and thus my list has got pretty long. And I want to check in on everyone at least once a week, and more often than that if they're in a cycle. And that takes a lot of time. Not sure if I should cut down so that I can post more often or if I'm happy with this wide circle of connections and happy to let the entries suffer a little in the short term. Because you can bet that during a cycle I'll be posting away with the best of them. I guess we'll all just have to wait and see what happens. If you see me posting a little less on your blog for a while, please forgive me, I am really really busy at work. And I don't have much new to say about infertility, just the same old same old.

Tomorrow is my laparoscopy. I am not looking forward to it, mostly because of how the general anaesthetic makes me feel, particularly how it dries out my throat for days afterwards. I hate it. But part of me is looking foward to this. Yaay, an intervention, something that might get us closer to our goal. Yaay! But I'm also very very frustrated with all the waiting. I was reading Prop's blog today and she's going to stim during her lap and do an IUI a few days after. That seems really really fast - too fast? - but I'm going to have to wait SIX WEEKS and then potentially a further six weeks before we get to retrieval. That's a long time in the life of a 39 year old infertile, people. I'll bring it up with Dr Candour tomorrow again, but I know what he'll say: "Thalia, the extra month is required for you to recover so you have the best chance of conceiving. Do you really want to jeopardise that?" And I'll look meek and say "Of course not," only I'll be seething internally.

I've had a pretty productive day. In addition to reading all of your blogs, I read a lot of newspapers, watched half of American Idol and all today's episodes of Gilmore Girls, then I put away all our books. We've lived in this house for over two years (hard to believe) but have until now had no bookshelves. Now we do, and now they are almost full. I didn't unpack some of H's book boxes as they are full of things called "Perfect your golf swing," and "The beauty of Trout," and I decided that if he wanted to own things like that he could make his own decisions about where they went. Plus I found a stack of old copies of "Bike" magazine that even I, the ultimate pack rat, would not have kept, but thought I'd better leave them to him to throw out. Where was H you ask? He was off walking with his boy-friends. He does this every few months. They go and live in a tent for a few days and climb mountains in the rain, eat lots of sausages and drink lots of beer. It's tremendous manly fun and I won't hear any fun being poked at it, you hear? He arrived back very smelly and slightly bearded and I was very pleased to see him.

Particularly because I had found, while unpacking, his diary from the year we met. I couldn't resist a peak. And I found something really adorable. I found our first date, and our second, then I found the following weekend. Which was a weekend that I couldn't see him as I had friends in town - the friends with whom we just stayed in DC - and it was a little early to introduce him to them. But still, I had an entry in his diary that weekend, he had recorded what I was doing with them. So on the Saturday it read: Hampstead and London Eye, and on Sunday, Hampton Court. The same was true a few weeks later when I was away on business, he'd recorded the trip. How cute is that? It made me fall in love with him all over again. He reallly is a very nice man.

And now I'm going to go and spend some time with my very nice man before it's too late and I'm too anxious about tomorrow. Wish me luck.

Comments

[Wavery]

I can't imagine stimming on top of a lap. Ouch! But then again my ovary was the point of the most endo/cutting, that's not true across the board.
As for you, Thalia, I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. Speedy recovery!

[amanda]

Good luck with the lap! I hope all goes well.

[Summer]

Worlds of luck to you on your lap tomorrow! I hope it's noneventful and you get some good results from it.

[Julianna]

I'll be thinking of you so much tomorrow.

Take care,

[Mary Scarlet]

Good luck, Thalia, I hope the lap goes really well. "The Beauty of Trout," hee hee. You do have a very nice man there ...I'm sure he'll take extra special care of you over the next week.

[Lori]

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and hoping the lap goes well. One step closer is right. 12 weeks to retrieval is a long time, I hope you can talk Dr. Candour into shortening that up a bit. Because waiting is just frustrating as all get out.
And yes, H does seem like a very nice man. What sweet journal entries.

[susan]

Good luck to you Thalia. I hope that the surgery and anesthesia are a snap. I'll be sending you positive vibes.

Susan

[Cricket]

When you meet the anesthetist, tell him/her your issues. For me, excessive dehydration led to me being stuck in the hospital all day until I peed after almost 3 IV bags. I think they dehydrated me extra b/c of my asthma. Also with my first surgery (both laproscopics for endo), I remembered being intubated when surgery began as well as recalling the conversations in recovery - I wasn't out far enough. The next surgery was a breeze in comparison - less dehydration and less memory. See if they can help you out?

[Ann]

Good luck tomorrow!

[md]

Best of luck on your lap tomorrow.

- from one blog reading addict, to another!

[P.]

Good luck tomorrow - I will be thinking about you! Sorry you can't see the beauty that is my blog. I wonder if you are having a firewall problem - the images are hosted by ripway. I get the plain white page when I am at work.

[fisher queen]

Your husband is such a sweetie! Good luck tomorrow honey.

[persephone]

Best wishes for tomorrow Thalia!

[mm]

ITA with Cricket. Maybe there's a way that they can adjust your meds so that you're no so dehydrated? My second surgery was pure joy compared to my first bc I told the anesthesiologist that I'd had severe nausea and dehydration after the first one (at a diff hospital with diff doctors). The new doctor gave me less/different drugs and it made all the difference. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and crossing everything that all goes well.

[Simone]

Good Luck Thalia.
You are the Queen of Blogging, I swear!

[Elizabeth]

Thalia - Good luck with your lap tomorrow! I will be thinking of you.

[Jennie]

wishing you oodles of luck for the lap, may it lead to wonderful things, trying v hard not to make male bonding jokes and how nothing bonds males more than the scent of 3 day old armpits and stubbly cheeks. good luck and i do hope you feel fantastic again very very soon

[Kath]

Good luck to you, my dear. I'll be thinking of you.

[Jenny]

I hope everything goes well today!
It is really nice of you to add all of us "newbies" to your list but please don't feel obligate to visit so often. Take care of yourself and come see us when you can.

[S]

Thalia, good luck with the lap-I hope all goes as smoothly as possible and that you'll be on your way to a cycle soon. I'll be thinking of you today....

[Jenn]

Good luck with the lap. I'm an anesthesia hater too, I hope it's not too bad.

[Flicka]

The best of good luck with the lap, my dear! I hope it all comes out perfectly.

H is lovely! Definitely a keeper.

[T]

Good luck with the lap - H is very sweet indeed!

[Liz]

Good luck with the lap.

[Mellie]

Wishing you a successful lap and an easy, speedy recovery. Don't worry about not posting so much either. We'll all still be here when you do!

[beagle]

I hope all is about to / is / did go well today! Surgery of any kind sucks but let's hope it nets you some advantage.

I think the diary proves you married Mr. Right. How sweet is that??!!

[LEB]

urgh, I hate generals too. I hope the lap wasn't too bad & you recover quickly.

[Leggy]

I'm with you on balancing reading all the blogs with finding time to write plus finding time to do anything else, like work. I like to read other blogs because I like to know what people are up to and I can relate to the ups & downs people experience. But it does take way too much time...

Good luck with the lap.

[Kristi]

You're so in my thoughts today. Please update soon and let us know how you are. And btw: how cute is your husband? You are a lucky girl, indeed.

[Em]

Hope it goes well. I was thinking...we should organise a UK meet-up???

I still haven't been on the London Eye.

[Anita]

Thinking of you.....

I too had a laproscopy and then waited 4 months just to give my body the best chance....it is an absolute drag so I can understand how you are feeling.

Take care and look forward to your update.

[Pamplemousse]

T, you should know by now that there are no rushing the docs here in the UK! Mmmm, did you mention sausages?? I hope things went well today.

[Cali]

Hope all is ok today. Been thinking about you.
Rest up & be well.
xo

[Manuela]

Hope you are recovering well from your lap!! Much affection, Thalia...

[Larisa]

Good luck Thalia. I hope the lap goes (went?) well, and I hope the 6 weeks flies by for you.

[Sparkle]

Hope you're recovering well from your lap.
Congrats on getting the books unpacked.

[Nico]

I hope your lap went well and that you're recovering nicely.

I used to watch Gilmore Girls religiously, but it's gotten so annoying in the last season. I finally killed it out of my Tivo list a few weeks ago. Sad. Need to find some other similarly snarky show to take it's place!

[Ornery]

I hope your lap went smoothly and that you're recovering nicely. Your husband sounds like such a sweetheart!

[wessel]

Thwack! (slapping you on the wrist for reading his sacred diary, but glad you found something sweet to make you fall in love all over again). :-)

Good luck with your lap. I would also rest a month. It will pass quickly.

I know what you mean about that blog list just growing and growing! I spend half my morning checking on my ladies. Ah well, what can you do. It would sure be easier if everyone had a system in place where I could be notified of any blog updates (I have one on my site called blogarithm).

[Sarah]

I hope everything went well yesterday and you are recovering comfortably!!!

[Lisa]

Good luck with the lap. I hope you recover quickly!

[statia]

Good luck.

[fertilityfauxpas]

I hope all went well with the lap, Thalia. I think I speak for many of us when I say how much we appreciate your checking up on all of our blogs. It's a lot of work! But, it is so nice to know, especially when cycling, that there are people all over the world thinking about you and wishing good things for you. Please know I'm over here wishing good things for you too...

[millie]

I hope all went well with the lap.

I loved the part about your husband's diary. That is so amazingly sweet.

I'm also a big Gilmore Girls fan. I also love Veronica Mars (do you get that? ) What is it with these wickedly wonderful Logans?

[Anna]

Hi Thalia, I do hope all went well with your lap yesterday. I hope you're feeling well, and getting ready for your cycle (even though you have time). How lovely to read about your husband's diary! What a dear man. I'm glad you have each other - it seems like such a wonderful match. Be well, and have a lovely Valentine's Day. xoxoxxo

[Nina]

I hope all went well with your lap. Hope you are taking it easy.

[elle]

Hope the lap went well. Thinking of you.

[ninaB]

hope your Lap was okay. i'm still recovering from mine (taking a bit longer than i thought). just the thought of injecting anything into my abdomen right now makes me wince. a bit of rest will do you (and me) some good.

[Prop Your Hips Up]

A few days late - but I wanted to post here and tell you how much it means to me that you do check in on me. I value your experience and your perspective. Now to finish catching up.