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Tuesday, 10 October 2006


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Oh, Thalia. I wished this hadn't happened. I wish you still felt safe to post here. I understand why you don't, though.

I know I'm not the only one who will miss your blogging. I wish you nothing but the best and hope that you'll be able to come back to this blog at some point. Good luck, my dear. I'll be thinking of you.


I am so sorry that this has happened. Not just because of what this has done to you, but because you have given everyone else so much to relate to in your posts, which are always more informative and insightful than many of those professionals who care for us and so we will miss that. It's not "their" fault, I can appreciate that, but they get too easily caught up in patients as stats and body parts.

I hope that you miss us soon and come back on or find another home, but in the meantime I completely respect your choice because you have to take care of you.

Yes, I have your email, and I know you have mine. Love to you, dear, dear Thalia.


Thalia, I will miss reading your posts for now and I completely understand why you are not going to for a while. I hope the next few months brings a pregnancy for you and it sticks. We will be waiting for you when you get back!

Cat, Galloping

oh thalia, hang in there. i'm sorry to see you go.


You are right - getting pregnant is the most important thing in your life.

However, I will miss you terribly. I wish you still felt safe posting, I wish I could take back that they ever saw your blog.

I'll still be thinking of you often.


You'd better stick around the blogosphere in one form or another. Your learned, slightly academic perspective on all things IF is so valued.
I will miss your blogging, but hope to see you around in the comments.


I wish you had decided otherwise. It feels like (just my opinion, not a criticism) that you are giving them more power than the deserve. I will miss reading your blog.


I've been reading from the beginning and have followed your ups and downs with joy and tears. I'm not infertile, in fact I'm one of "them" in a way - I'm a midwife - and I can tell you that reading your words has given me a tiny insight into the way that the women I'm caring for who have conceived using IVF may be feeling, and enabled me to feel empathy with them in a way I may not have been able to do otherwise. I will miss reading your blog and I will miss you. Please check back if you become pregnent!

All the very very best to you and H. You have me rooting for you! xx


You definately need to do what feels right for you. Sorry that you have lost your safe place and sorry that a IF sister will no longer be sharing her journey.

Wishing you success on your journey to becoming a mom.


Oh sweetie, this is so so sad. As you know, I had to make this same very difficult decision recently and it is just heartbreaking. And infuriating.

You have made such a difference in this community, Thalia. We will miss your words.

Love to you and H. Thinking of you.


Thalia I am so sad this has happened and now you will suffer loss of the support that has helped you in so many ways. I'll keep tabs on if you post and will think of you. I know you have to do what feels right for you. And if that means disappearing for awhile (or even changing your mind and staying), we will all be here with open arms.


Well...that is a damned shame.


T -
I have enjoyed your writing very much - and I hope the next few months bring you the peace and joy you deserve.

Please check in now and then.


Thalia, reading this is really hard. You have been one of the most helpful kind bloggers in this community and to think that your safe place is gone, is just not fair. Of course you have to discuss this with the doctors, it can't be left with an open end. The whole situation seems odd. I'm trying to avoid commenting on why several dr's would violate your private space like this. I hope that this is a temporary leave and that we hear from you again soon.


I wish you wouldn't stop. I agree with Liana, more power than they deserve. I will miss you but hope we can "continue" on my blog or by email. Good luck.


I'm so sorry to see this post. I hope that you're able to find a way to keep blogging in a safer space. And I also hope that I'm able to find you if and when you return. But you're absolutely right. Getting pregnant is the most important thing and if this blog is now an obstacle rather than a help, then by all means you have to stop (at least for now). But I'll definitely miss hearing from you.

Lut C.

Let me first selfishly cry out NOOOOOOO!

You have to do what you have to do. I understand, but I wish the doctors understood what a sacrifice you're making here.


This is so hard to read and process. You have helped me and others more than you can ever imagine and I hate that you have lost the safe place that you needed and deserved. It pains me to see you go.


I am very angry with the doctors for violating your private space. If you are reading this, doctors, you should be ashamed. Thalia is lucid, fluent, fair and above all HELPFUL TO THE REST OF US. Her blog helps other people with fertility problems. And what's more, she has been positive about her clinic: I was even going to ask her where she was having treatment, because it sounded like a place worth knowing about. I got the impression you were caring and helpful. Instead, you're more worried... about what???? What is there to be self-conscious about, clinic???? What has she done that can seriously bother you???? No one even knows who you are.
I read Thalia's blog because I like her blog persona, and I like the way she writes and because she has something to say that other people identify with. Struggling to have a child is exceptionally, horrifyingly tough. And I haven't even had a bad time of it. I would hate to have my blog taken away from me, and I hope that you think hard about your actions and how they have impacted on one of your patient's support system. Because that is what a blog is...an invaluable support system.
As for you Thalia. I am very, very, very, sorry to see you go. I understand your decision. I would feel exposed and violated in your position. I am angry on your behalf. And I will miss you.
But most of all I sincerely hope, I really hope, that your quest to have a child succeeds. I really, really hope that you become a parent. You sound like an extremely nice woman, and I would like to know you in real life. I have warmed to your husband. I want you both to have a baby.
Best Wishes,


Thalia, yours is one of just two blogs I check in on daily. I read yours because you inspire me - because you are proactive, courageous and intelligent - and you make me feel that if you can keep going, then maybe I can to. I have never found your blog anything other than fair-minded. Were it unfairly 'snarky' or cheap I would have stopped reading long ago. You may get support from blogging Thalia, but I have got a lot of support from you (without you even knowing). I'll miss you hugely. You mentioned you're not sure you believe in God, not sure I do either, but, just in case, you and Jill (from knocked up, knocked down) are in my prayers every night anyway. I'll keep you there, until you blog to say you've made it.


I guess the response to my last comment would be no, today is not better. I'm so sorry, Thalia. I don't know what I'd do in your shoes, so I can only say I hate that you feel you've lost the "safety" of your blog. I know I'm not much of a commenter on your blog, but I'll miss keeping up to date with you.

I hope I still see you around my "house" on occasion, and that somehow, this all blows over for you and you reach a place of safety and strength again with your doctors and clinic.


Those self-righteous bastards! Katty is absolutely right, the doctors are wrong and they should not have any sway over your personal support systems. We all need you Thalia, and I think you need us too.

You will be very missed and it will be a complete shame that your selfish doctors are forcing you into this corner. I am sorry to be 'negative' or 'snarky' but I seriously believe they should support that you need an area to discuss your treatment that is private and they don't get a vote.


I understand your need to do this, that this is what you must do. I've always admired your strength in horribly difficult circumstances.

But, oh, how I will miss your posts! I am so sad and angry you had to choose between the people who may help you have a baby and, well, us.

I hope this is only temporary and that you come back soon to post about pregnancy and motherhood.

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