You're saying all the right things but I'm a basket case. I called H earlier in the hopes of him cheering me up, but he told me he'd had a panic attack about it earlier this afternoon. He really believes in my judgement of my bodily signals, that's the problem. Perhaps I need to keep this freaking out stuff to myself rather than burdening him? He did ask what my 'friends' thought about it and when I told him you'd all told me to calm down, he said "well perhaps your friends are cleverer than we are." And of course you are.
I might or might not be having a bit of cramping. Personally I think I'm making it up, or that my body has been so cowed into submission that it's giving me little twinges, but only when I think about whether or not I'm having twinges, just to try and make me feel better. I have only had three twinges when I wasn't consciously checking to see if I had any twinges, and they were very sharp and probably gas instead.
Is ligament pain in your inner thighs a sign?
Blimey I sound like a complete newbie from the boards obsessing about symptoms. I don't deserve to live, someone shoot me please.
I feel like ranting and raving but that really makes for such boring posts. And I've written them before. That's the thing about infertility, it just goes on and on and on being horrible and stressful. Even in pregnancy none of us seem to relax. It's all hard.
I do know intellectually that we might get pregnant this cycle. I also know that we might not - and in fact the chances are more in favour of the latter. I know that if we don't get pregnant we'll keep going but oh the journey is just getting harder.
And for those who asked, yes, I will POAS. I did it at 11dp2dt last time, but this time that would be Monday which I think is a no-no. I will POAS on Sunday, to give me a whole day of no interruptions from the world to get over it. 10dp2dt is plenty late enough to get a signal if there is going to be one. In Julie's pregnancy with Charlie, she got a positive (as seen "by the light of a thousand suns") on 8dp3dt, which is the same as my Saturday morning. But given it was so light perhaps I'll wait til Sunday. Let's see if I can hold out. I'd rather not have the snowy white space and wonder if I just tested too early. And yes, I know all pregnancies are different and just because Julie got a positive that day doesn't mean I will. But it's my fucked up logic and I'll stick to it if I want to.