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Sunday, 02 July 2006

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lindy

So good to hear how things are going. You sound like you're in a very good place for moving forward with the next round (well, you know, as good as can be expected...). Looking forward to hearing what Dr. Candour has to say.

Linda

Okay. You have to post the recipes after tempting our palates with those descriptions! I, also, cook for therapy, but our current kitchen is so small that I have a hard time mustering up the will to actually make anything spectacular these days.

My friend "D" is in London and she might know of a good trainer. She's only been there a year, but she always knows what's going on and where it seems.
www.palefrog.com

Suz

It amazed me how much our relationships lapsed during our infertility and how slowly they're coming back - but they are. I'm glad that both of you are doing the things that bring you relaxation and joy.

Summer

Thanks for the update. I had been wondering how you were doing, but remembered how much I just wanted to pull inward after my miscarriage to regain my footing (recharge?) to be able to deal with the world again. I'm glad to hear your and H are socializing a bit. It sounds like it was a good thing.

kristi

I was wondering how you were doing, and checking back here everyday for an update. Your baking efforts sound incredible, and I find it therapeutic as well. Most of all, though, I'm glad you're healing.

Kay

So glad you checked in. It's good that you are both doing what comforts you to get through this time. And your muffins sound *divine*! Looking forward to hearig how your meeting with Dr. Candour goes. Hang in there.

Em

Thalia you sound like an awesme cook. I am rubbish. That is a goal I have - to be able to follow recipes and make yummy food for people. It sounds like you are nurturing yourself and H. I was really upset about England losing. Seeing David Beckam and Rio Ferdinand crying made me feel well, bad. Then my husband said "why do you feel sorry for them. It;s obscene the amount of money they are paid blah blah..."

Urban Chick

i think withdrawing from the world is a very common phenomenon when you are on the infertility treadmill - i know it's what happened to me (too many friends presented unpalatable scenarios: being with pregnant friends, being with friends who had babies/kids)

it's such a shame because ordinarily, friends are such an important support when your chips are down - maybe that's where cyberbuddies can pick up...?

anyway, i do know someone in london who has a personal trainer about whom they sing praises (although my jaw dropped a mile when i heard their hourly rate!) so feel free to email me offline if you want me to pass on some more details

UC
[regular reader, infrequent commenter!]

Lut C.

Argh! Those muffins are so tempting. Must. Resist. Damn the IF diet! ;-)

You sound like you're finding solid ground under your feet again. I'm glad to hear that.

Meri-ann

So good to hear from you Thalia, I've been wondering how you are getting on. Thanks btw for the ESHRE post, my WonderDoc was also there so you gave me some ideas to jot down and ask him when I see him in the next couple of weeks.
I can really relate to you feeling uninspired about blogging, at the moment it just feels like I'm 'diarising' my days (did I just make up a word?!) with nothing of any value to blog about, well nothing that anyone would be interested in reading or commenting on... *sigh*
At least you can cook, it's one of my goals to eventually be able to scrape together something palatable, and I'm sure my boy would love it too.....

Mary Ellen

You sound like a fantastic cook Thalia! I really am awful and I lack the motivation to try. It sounds like you are doing better. That's great to hear. Hugs!

OvaGirl

Love your spirit Thalia, you are fantastic. And those muffins completely rock.

sube

So nice to hear about the things keeping you busy. I hope the cooking, socializing, and gym time help you start feeling like yourself again.

Erin

Now I'm really hungry and want to go make carrot-raisin muffins (my current favorite). But I think I'll wait until morning, as they're better fresh and warm from the oven.

It's good to hear that you and H had such a nice time watching the squash match and talking with friends. Despite having multiple infertile IRL friends in town, I still find myself withdrawing from activities when I'm just not feeling up to keeping a smile on my face. It's just one of the side-effects of IF that no one understands unless they're going through it.

soralis

All that talk about food is making me hungry! Sounds like you make some wonderful stuff!

Take care and I hope you continue to heal

StellaNova

It's like getting back onto the bicycle again after you have fallen and hurt yourself. You know you'll enjoy it when you do, but you're nervous, and scared you might fall again. I found social time with 'good' friends (ie. those who either knew and were appropriately sympathetic or those who didn't but were great people anyway) an essential part of my recovery. I had underestimated how important they would be. I'm glad you're out there again.

It took me about 6 1/2 weeks from the day of the D&C until my next period came. I had been charting my temp. and it took a few weeks for it to drop, which is when I took it to indicate that the HcG was finally out of my system and I could ovulate again (which I obviously did). I hope that helps, although I'm sure everyone's different.

By the way, in answer to your question about my PhD, it's in Educational Change, specifically, the 'negotiated evolution of change' between the participants of the change and the ongoing 'identity' of the change. In other words, I am case studying a specific and major change at my school and looking at the ways in which implementing the change impacts on the teachers involved; and the ways in which they impact on the nature and direction of the change in reverse. I am using the genealogical theories of Foucault (dead, French, postmodern theorist) to analyse my data. Sounds like fun, you say? Damn right ... :)

Meg

Thalia - so glad to hear you sounding well and (moderately) happy. :) Love to you xx

Kath

Dear Thalia, it's so good to hear from you, and to know you're in a (bless relativism, eh?) fairly OK place. I'm glad you're getting out and seeing people a little -- it does help, though it's so hard to muster the strength/courage to do so. Well done you!

As for the England-Portugal game, it was EXCRUCIATING. I watched the penalties through my fingers, and there was much groaning and gnashing of teeth. And English friend of mine has said for years that he always leaves the house when it gets to the penalty shoot-out, because he knows his team will lose. (Not just the national team, but his favorite Premier League team too.) Oh well, he was right again, poor fellow. Not that they were playing fantastically well, but still, Portugal (except for their goalie) sucked. How can you miss the goal on two penalties, and still win? Ah yes, the goalie. That is one great goalie.

Did you see the Germany/Argentina game? It was similarly hair-raising, though the end was more gratifying. You should have seen the happy crowds here -- I had to laugh when I saw a carful of Turkish women with headcoverings, gaily waving the German flag. Made me go warm all over.

You mentioned HCG levels -- just wanted to tell you that it took ages (I think more than a month) for mine to disappear, so you might just pee on a (sensitive but incredibly cheap) stick to know what your body's up to. My first cycles after the D&C were very odd indeed.

As for your muffin invitation (that WAS an invitation, wasn't it?) I'll be right by.

Womb in waiting

Wow thalia, i know all is not what it seems, but it does seem like you've successfully re-engaged with life & im wow'ed. I know its not like that & its all taken huge conscious effort im sure but im still impressed & your efforts to socialise & create / cook & care about other things again is commendable. it is so hard to do & youre doing it even slightly so - well done!!!!!! your muffins & breakies sound amazing. & even going back to the trainer - youre a star!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thinking of you x ps-thanx so much for your supportive comment on my blog -it is all helping me so much x

Sunnie

And you rock :)

Pamplemousse

In the You mag with the Mail on sunday yesterday, Normandie Keith was raving about some trainer(the Bodydoctor at the Chelsea Club?) who was licking her into shape in 6 weeks after her IVF pregnancy. It said it was £80 per session so not cheap but she said it worked miracles. There was also a DVD too, I think. If you need more info, I can rake the mag out of the recycling!

Cooking and socilaising are good although i find myself not wanting to do either at the moment (again!).

Pamplemousse

Damn my trigger posting finger. Ech, that would be socialising, of course!

KatieS

Those muffins sound wonderful. And that stupid England match. Arg. (NB: No "I'm sorry.") The muffins... This post has made me hungry.

zarqa

Those muffin recipes are inspiring. And for making all three recipes at once: wow!

So true about the nurturing...for me it's been sewing, almost maniacal really. No baby, but the baby quilt is almost done.

Tag this one with muffins or recipes or something so I can find it later?

MoMo

Thalia, wow those muffins looks and sounds yummy!! I am getting hungry. Sorry to hear about your brother and SIL-I hope that they work things out.

And England, oh England...my S was so depressed on Saturday I couldn't get him to do anything after the game.

Good luck with the appointment with Dr. Candour tomorrow.

AnnMarie

So glad to learn that you have found your culinary outlet, and I'm proud of you for getting back into the groove of things. I wish you luck with Dr. Candour. I hope he can give you the info you need.

VanillaDreams

Thalia,

I'm so glad to hear an update from you!

The baking sounds awesome! I love to cook actually, but not the baking so much.

I can cook pretty much anything from scratch, because I don't use recipes. But of course, baking is a much more "exact science" which forces me to use a recipe, or memorize tons and tons of exact measurements! So, it doesn't interest me as much.

I do love my Vanilla Streusel Coffee Cake though, and it's the one baked good I do make a few times a year. :)

Also, you sound like you are doing remarkably well considering everything you've gone through, and I admire you. It took a good solid two months before I even began to recover slightly from my miscarriage. It felt like I was in a deep, dark hole, and I had to climb my way out of it. It was awful, and took a long, long time.

I look forward to hearing how your appt goes with Dr. C -- hope you get some answers and a plan of action going for the near future.

All the best,

Alli

Glad things are moving along for you - never "moving on," I know, but moving along. Thinking of you and so happy you are back! {{hugs}}

Vivien

Good to see you back again.
I have no idea if it's true, but I heard somewhere that you are more likely to get pregnant in the 3 months following a miscarriage. Probably nonsense, but definitely worth a nice meal and the bottle of wine! Good luck with Dr C. I hope he tells you what you need to hear.
Oh - and sorry I was feeling very dull when I commented on your last post - I did figure out those links in the end, but can't find any more information on Dr Google about the differences between miscarriage before / after the heartbeat has been seen.
Oh well.

Jennie

I'm glad you're getting homework to go out and hang out with friends, I'm the same way you are I get anxious not wanting to go, but once I do I usually have a good time. It's a nice distraction.

And thank you again for your nice comments on my blog, they are truly appreciated.

mm

Mmmmmufins!!!! So glad you posted and let us know how you're doing.

chee chee

I am glad that you are doing better and have starting doing things that you enjoy again. I hope that your appt. goes well and that you get some good news tomorrow.

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