I'm feeling grumpy because I just got my upward feedback report from work, and it's only just above average for my peers. It's not bad, but I feel very frustrated. I've tried so hard in the last 6 months not to let any of what I'm going through affect people at work, after my feedback in the autumn showed that it was having an impact and people could tell my heart wasn't in my job. So although this one is better, it's depressing that it's still not great. Although I have figured out that this one includes the whole year, not just the last six months, so the last six months must have been considerably better to have lifted me back over the average. It has still made me cry. I just want there to be something in my life that I am indubitably great at, and I thought it was my mentoring of my staff, but apparently not. That's very disappointing.
Which is annoying because today brought good news again on the cycle. We have 13 follicles, people, count them, 13! Two are so small they won't do us any good, but still, to even be able to measure 13 is pretty miraculous to me.
- On the right, still over-achieving: 20, 18, 17, 16, 16, 15, 15, 13
- On the left, still sulking: 19, 16, 16, 12, 11
- E2: 4992 (1360 US)
- Lining: 11.6mm
It was a bizarre experience to lie there and see all those follicles in the right ovary. Each one overlapping with the other as she moved the wand around. I don't know how the ovaries of those of you who produce 27 follicles have room, this one looked pretty full up!
I got my prescription for enoxaparin, to be started the day after egg collection. H is going to the chemist's this afternoon to get some extra folic acid to take on top of my ironic prenatal. On the one hand on this cycle I have done much less to try and control how things turn out - no acupuncture, no wheat-free-ness, no fertility yoga; on the other hand we are doing much more medical intervention. Let's see if it makes any difference.
The instructions are to do the orgalutron injection tomorrow morning but no puregon, then do the ovitrelle injection at 10pm on Saturday night, collection on Monday. I am suspicious about the no puregon because I'm keen that those 15mm babies catch up. I discussed with Dr Gorgeous what the downside to taking it was, and she said they're concerned that my E2 will go too high, and that I'll be overstimulated. With this many follicles that seems unlikely, and I am tempted to go ahead and do a final puregon injection tomorrow. Sacrilege, I know, ignoring the doctor's instructions, but I think this is another incidence of them being over-cautious and the downside doesn't seem very bad to me. We'll see how I feel at 7am tomorrow. I'll keep you all in suspense til then.