It feels like there are cycles in our little infertility blogosphere. Positive, up cycles, and then downturns. Now I know there are many infertility blogs out there that I don't read - I imagine each of us having our own circle in one big Venn diagram. We all have our own list of blogs we read, and all of those overlap in some way. Maybe right out on the western spiral arm of this massive venn diagram, there's someone where no one is reading their blog...but that won't be the case for long. Sooner or later, it will get googled or they'll find someone else's blog and read it, and comment, and that will be that. They'll be folded into our blogosphere via someone's blogroll. And their world will be a little tiny bit easier because of it.
Just did a little research while finding that picture (my first picture, yay!) and discovered that it's pretty much impossible to draw Venn diagrams when the number of variables (in this instance, the number of blogs) is greater than 11. So we're a hell of a complex set of interelated stories!
Anyway, this was supposed to be about cycles. There was a positive cycle a few months ago. Suz, Bugs, Jen, Tania, Dramalish, T, Susie, PJ, Panda and Mudbug, are all now between 10 and 17 weeks pregnant. Then we had a downturn. Bad things happened to Danae, Katie's first and Julianna's fourth IVF cycles were a bust, Liana's egg donor got pregnant, Mare's cycle resulted in a BFN, Nico, Mellie, Ms Pru and I all got BFNs from our IUI cycles (or in my case, a no-bloody-IUI cycle), Megan had a miscarriage. Then just last week Pamplemousse's second IVF cycle got cancelled even before transfer, Amanda had a miscarriage after her fourth IVF had for a few short weeks looked like it had worked, and it became increasingly likely that Julia was about to have her ninth miscarriage. Or an ectopic. Take your pick. That's a lot of pain.
I'm sure I've missed people out here, even in my own bit of the big Venn diagram. And I know that the human brain is programmed to recognise patterns, so that we constantly search for them - and find them - regardless of whether or not they are real. And I'm well aware that even while my so-called-negative cycle has been going on, there has been good news. Soper has finally met her Moonpie, Figlet has met her Jillian, Jen is DTC, BrooklynGirl and Grrl have both had their lovely boys, and EnoughAlready has had her girls. But somehow, perhaps because all of those are about mothers meeting babies that they already knew about, or perhaps in my own ego-centric world I'm focused on the getting pregnant side of things right now, it still seems like a downturn. (I'm conveniently and un-scientifically ignoring the good news from T and Anna during the same period)
Do you think it's like the stockmarket? We could plot movements in different stories and thereby classify the infertilityblogosphere as in a bull or a bear cycle? How handy would that be? We could then all time our cycles for the bull market. Oh. Wait. That would really skew the market, so then it would be in a downturn, then we'd be back to square one.
So I guess there's nothing for it but to persevere at the time that we and our doctors think it's right for us. So those of us who are launching into IVF or IUI cycles during September and October, we just have to take our luck in both hands. And jump.